What does Valentine’s Day really mean?Cat and Nat tell you their own stories

Cat says

Every February across the developed world, chocolates, flowers and presents are exchanged between loved ones, all in the name of St Valentine.
I remember distinctively the excitement of St Valentine’s Day when I was a teenager at boarding school in England. Each February 14, the postman would bring sacks of Valentine cards to our school, an all-girls school, and everyone would be waiting with anticipation to receive their cards.
There was obviously always a great deal of competition to see who got the most cards. In most cases the cards came from our neighbouring boys’ school, although I think many of the girls sent cards to themselves or their friends to flatter their egos. Valentine’s Day was probably the most exciting and most anticipated day each year for our hormone-charged school.
 Valentine’s Day has never been quite the same for me since. Somehow the excitement died out when there were no longer 100 other girls to compete with. Of course, once one gets married, the mystery of Valentine’s Day dies completely, especially if one’s husband is British – British men are not known for being terribly romantic!
More importantly, how do we keep romance alive for Valentine’s Day even when mystery dies? Well, I have come to the conclusion that gestures of affection are the key, which is why entertaining your loved one is one of the most practical ways of saying “I love you”.
Diamonds may be a girl’s best friend, but personally I believe the most romantic way to celebrate Valentine’s Day is to enjoy a specially prepared dinner with your lover, boyfriend or husband, with a bottle of good champagne or wine.
Here’s a menu I designed for those who want to cook a truly decadent romantic dinner for their loved ones to enjoy under the stars. (Let’s hope it won’t be too hot and humid on Tuesday night!)

Drinks
- Pre-dinner cocktails: Bellini
Blend together two medium ripe fresh peaches, chilled, seeded and sliced, three tablespoons of freshly squeezed lemon juice, two tablespoons of water. Place a tablespoon of peach puree into champagne flute, and top up with prosecco or dry sparkling wine.
- Champagne or a special bottle of wine at dinner with sparkling mineral water
- After-dinner drink: Irish coffee with champagne truffles
 
Food
- Caviar or fresh oysters on ice, ideally served with champagne
- Steamed fresh artichokes served with melted butter
- Home-made beetroot tagliatelle with lobster tails in white wine sauce
- Fresh salmon fillets baked with pesto and parmesan topping
- Duck confit served with a mixed salad of baby leaves, dried berries and
crumbled stilton cheese 
- Hot chocolate soufflé served with hot chocolate sauce and vanilla ice cream

When it comes to decorating the table, it has to be a Valentine’s Day bouquet, but how do you improve on the classic Valentine’s Day bouquet? Well, I am so bored of red roses that my dream Valentine’s bouquet is a large bunch of blush-pink peonies, far more lush and luxurious than the standard red rose.
An early-morning trip to Pak Khlong Talad is a must for those who wish to get their loved ones some original flowers on Valentine’s Day.

Nat says

 What I am about to tell you is a true story.
Almost 10 years ago on Valentine’s Day, I made a desperate plea to the god Brahma at the Erawan shrine. I had been through the gay male equivalent of an unsavoury divorce (thank goodness we are now, finally, friends) and I’d had relationships with numerous jerks and idiots following in rapid succession. I despaired of ever finding true love.
In an effort to make sure that I didn’t make any more mistakes, I made a list of qualities I felt imperative in a mate. Among the points that can be revealed in print, I wanted:
- A man who is happy and open about being gay
- A man who is my age and acts it
- A man who bathes regularly and likes cologne
- A man who doesn’t mind getting mud on his shins and dirt on his hands
- A man who has good table manners but will wipe up a good sauce with bread
- A man who’s faced hard times and has emerged sadder and wiser, but happier
- A man who knows that money is necessary but that enough is enough
- A man who knows Theravada from Mahayana
- A man who knows about Wittgenstein but lives by common sense
- A man who knows Monet from Renoir
- A man knows good design when he sees it
- A man who is drug-free, including nicotine
- A man who loves sport and exercise
- A man who will love my family, even though I sometimes don’t
- A man who is sincere, but schmoozes well
- A man with integrity
I thought that such a list would help me separate the wheat from the chaff or, to be more precise, the prince from the frogs. But no matter how hard I searched, I couldn’t find anyone who met my criteria.
Now you might think that I was being superficial and, I admit, some of my requirements were a bit shallow. But I thought that, by making it clear to myself what I should be looking for, I would be less likely to get my heart broken. I even met someone who seemed to fulfil all of the points on the list, but he had the minor fault of being obsessed with someone else.
I realised I had to start over. The list simply wasn’t working. There I was, in my mid-30s, divorced and probably destined to be alone for the rest of my life.
Suddenly Valentine’s Day crept up on me and the world was full of lovers. Everywhere I looked, there was someone walking past holding a red rose, either to give or as a gift from that special someone. It was disgusting. I felt cheated. Why was everyone else in love and shamelessly flaunting it to all and sundry? Furthermore, why was it impossible to get a table anywhere for dinner? And then I realised that maybe I was asking too much. Maybe I was unwilling to face how truly lonely I was. It was time to admit that I wanted someone, anyone.
So I went to the Erawan shrine and asked Brahma for one thing: to find someone to whom I could be good who would be good to me. That’s all. Forget about Renoir and Wittgenstein.
After saying my prayer and making my offerings, I went into the hotel and up to the fitness centre, where I was a member and, right then and there, I met my boyfriend. It was that immediate. He didn’t seem to have any of the qualities on the list, but we got on very well. It wasn’t love at first sight but, over the years, it has become the greatest love I have ever known.
Then, one day, I found the list while cleaning out a drawer. I read it, thinking I’d have a good laugh. To my surprise, my boyfriend was all the important things on the list. He may not give a damn about Wittgenstein, but he has integrity. He’s a fair deal younger than I am but he is sincere, wise and happy.
People may say that this was a coincidence, but I know that Brahma heard me.

Want an opinion on something? Cat and Nat can be contacted at
NnaSWild@aol.com.