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In the dream, she told me she wanted to grant me one wish and asked me what it would be. I, for some reason unclear to me, did not waste even one nano-second to say these three words: "Make me understand". My grandmother looked at me with the kindest eyes, and turned and walked away as light as a feather, as quietly as she came. I ran after her, wanting to stop her from leaving again, and all the while repeating my wish: "Make me understand. Make me understand. Make me…" I woke up in the middle of one sentence, and finished it: "…understand".

All these years later I find myself still running, searching, trying, and failing to understand. I have tried to make peace with myself that there will always be countless things beyond my comprehension. But I am not prepared to let this one go, not so quietly, not yet.

At the tip of the iceberg, we are a nation without aspiration. We do not know what it is we are pursuing collectively as a country, except a higher GDP, perhaps. Look deeper - as a society we are one Augean stable, trying to sweep all the dirt and filth under the rug, pretending everything is hunky-dory.

Illegal and illicit drugs are now so prevalent, so widespread that in many places they more easily acquired than some types of chewing gum. In some schools, teachers supplement their meagre income by becoming pushers and, students hooked on drugs, become their agents. In the countryside the situation is graver than in Bangkok. In these less affluent places, young people do not have anything or anyone to hold on to or look up to, no role model, no prospects. They resort to alcohol and drugs to pass the time. Drug killings are common and no big deal. Villagers know about it but do not know what to do; the authorities know, and do nothing; probably they are part of the problem, not a solution.

In a province about 300 kilometres from Bangkok, sex among children begins as early as 10 years of age. Parents know, but they have no wherewithal to stop the activities. When asked if teen pregnancy is common, most parents answer negatively. "These youths, they know about protection. Maybe that's why they think sex is a no-brainer, no need to think twice. Their friends are doing it, so they want to try too," said a woman in her 40s lamenting the fast deterioration of the social situation in her once idyllic village.

But sexual promiscuity among children is not the worst story you will hear. In many provinces in the Northeast, it's now "fashionable" for village girls to find foreigners and turn them into their "sugar daddy". These girls go to Pattaya, Phuket or Krabi, where foreign retirees like to visit or relocate, and lure them. Some teachers even organise their students during the summer break to go to these places and facilitate these activities for their own financial gain. Ask some government officials in provinces like Udon and Khon Khaen, and if they trust you, they will confirm this trend. These girls extort money from their foreign sugar daddies to pay family debts, build them homes, buy jewellery. Many treat their partners very poorly and vice versa, but for some reason the abused do not seem to mind.

With Aids still a fear, older men prefer their sex partners younger and younger. Up north, some parents enter into a contract to sell their daughters as soon as they reach puberty, and some elevate themselves into recruiters in their own village. If it's only you in your village who has a beard on your forehead, you are a freak; if most people in the same village have the same feature, you are part of the majority, you become an acceptable norm, and not a repulsive exception.

In Bangkok there is a "society" called "Papa's Children" comprising good-looking youths who become willing sexual partners of older and wealthy men. Some use the money for their college tuition, some to buy designer items and support expensive habits. We run into them in the streets, in restaurants, and in the malls, but we do not see them. We do not want to see them.

Thanks to years of corruption and neglect, our education system is in a sorrowful state. Going to an "after-school" school is now a necessity. Teachers from regular schools teach at these after-school schools, where students study to get good grades. Competition is intense, so parents will do whatever it takes to give their children an extra edge. Why these children cannot get a decent education in a regular school is a mystery.

Look at one of the pillars of our society - the institutionalised Buddhist religion - and we see a reflection of how deep we as a society have descended. This pillar is old and tired, ruined by erosion of faith and discipline, with no effective and practical supervision to weed out bad elements. True, there are many temples that remain true to the religious teachings and principles, but the number is dwindling.

Culturally, Thailand is becoming a country with no past, because young people are forgetting their history and heritage. No, they are not just forgetting - they were not taught to pay attention. There are so few role models of substance, except ubiquitous celebrities such as movie stars and singers, both local and imported. "Thailand's-got-talent"-type shows attract more young adults for auditions and elicit more earnest efforts to excel from youngsters than any academic contest. The increasing lopsided alacrity in attitude towards instant gratification is alarming.

Social ills do not happen overnight, they are the fruits of long-term neglect, abuse and imbalance. We are losing our compass, becoming a cowboy without a horse, a fireman without a hose. For years, no serious and concerted effort has been expended to reverse the direction. Why? Aren't we supposed to be a better and more caring people? If more than sixty per cent of our children believe corruption is acceptable, and calculated lies are allowed to spread freely to gullible listeners, why are we not alarmed enough to spring into action and rectify them? Why hasn't society produced more of Mechai Viravaidya and fewer "toxic assets" on our national scene? How long do we think we can afford to turn a blind eye and expect the rug to indefinitely hold the dirt?

Someone, please make me understand.