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Published on January 12, 2008

 Wan-Wan, my poodle-pup, was especially annoying, jumping on my big cat Pan-Pan and trying to hump him. Though Pan is larger than the doggie, he doesn't fight her off. He simply waits for her to stop.

She, however, won't stop. Though she was spayed several months ago, this overtly bad sexual behaviour continues, but perhaps now it's more aggressive than lustful.

Other factors are in play as well, I think. Pan is the doggie's "sex toy", but Yoyo, the brat-cat, is her best friend. Yoyo can take care of himself around Wan. It's a real treat watching the two enjoy each other's company.

Around the other cats, though, Yoyo's become increasingly aggressive over the past months. He attacks Susu regularly, but now he's also attacking Pan.

To me, Wan and Yoyo are feeding each other's aggressiveness. I'm a bit puzzled. I've known dogs in the same pack who've pushed each other towards aggressive behaviour, but I've never met a dog and a cat working in cahoots this way.

Both Wan and Yoyo know that the behaviour is unacceptable, but they can't seem to stop. The sight of Pan spurs them on to mayhem and destruction.

Mee, the doggie next door, might be four times Wan's size, but she's lot more gentle. However, she's so big and doesn't know her own strength, which is why her owner is reluctant to bring her around to mine for a visit.

Thus Wan depends a lot on Yoyo. Since she also knows that he's better than she is at catching mice, cockroaches and birds, she constantly kisses him on the mouth, just to check what prey he's maiming.

As I settled down with a glass of wine to wait for midnight, though, she was not kissing anyone. She was by the door looking upwards. Then I heard Yoyo's mournful cry.

He was in real trouble, having somehow ended up in the decorative rectangular space above the archway. In his panic, he couldn't get down.

I drained the water from the turtle tubs below him, pulled out the stepladder, but my own fear of heights kept me from reaching him. "Don't leave me!" I think he kept howling, while Wan continued barking in encouragement.

Attracted by the noise, Mee's owner looked out her door and immediately recognised the problem. She summoned her brother-in-law, a much braver soul than I. Despite his fear of cats, he leapt lightly up the stepladder and reached for Yoyo, just as the clock on TV began bonging out midnight.

Just then, Mee noticed that all the gates were open and rushed in to find Wan. Angel greeted her ecstatically - they're friends - Mee began barking, and Wan, in her cage, barked back.

Yoyo, meanwhile, finding himself being carried through the air by a stranger, screamed in absolute fear. My neighbour, chasing Mee around my house, was screaming too in embarrassment.

I, of course, could be of no assistance. At the 12th bong, it was officially 2008, and I was doubled over in laughter. It may not have been a peaceful New Year, but it certainly was a lot of fun.

Questions about your pets? Fax (02) 751 4446 or e-mail laurie@nationgroup.com.

By Laurie rosenthal  

The Nation