Nonetheless, in the finest tradition of politics, leading Thai Rak Thai members have now moved on to pastures new without any trace of ordure staining their reputations. Unless, of course, they get a phone call from the Assets Examination Committee.

And now the committee has got down to work, there is the delicious speculation about the precise nature of the ousted government's indiscretions, and if statements by Deputy Director Pittaya Charoenwan of the National Housing Association (NHA) are anything to go by, we're in for a real treat.

"There's no irregularity," he purred last week during the graft probe into the Ua Athorn "We Care" housing project. "The NHA purchased land there at Bt850,000 per rai, based on an estimate by an appraiser registered with the stock market.

But the Land Department has used a different standard of appraisal, which calculates the land there at just Bt60,000 per rai. That's all." Quite. Tiny appraisal discrepancy. Like Bt790,000's worth.

No wonder corruption creates great geysers of wealth. People get drenched in cash. Wonderful! Imagine being involved. Think of the fun of being able to say: "If this is wrong I don't want to know about right."

Did you cast your eye down the assets list of our previous great and good? How can they possibly get by on those amounts when 85 per cent of the country takes home less than Bt12,000 a month?

Never has so much been done for a few at the expense of the many.

We are living through a rare moment: the examination of a party that shaped the last five years. Grab a seat.

***

A constitution is a wonderful thing. The British version is so good, it's not even written down, and they like it that way, believing it allows for flexibility and change to occur without too many problems. It has evolved over the centuries and is unique. Though unwritten, it lacks neither force nor efficiency. Derived from many sources, it has a richness and diversity that are truly remarkable. The best written constitution on earth, in America, took over three years of multi-party debate to bring it to perfection. Thailand has to come up with a new or seriously revised constitution - in less than year.

But no matter how good it is, you can't make a constitution idiot-proof because idiots are so ingenious.

***

China confirmed last week that its border guards had shot dead a refugee, a 25 yearold nun, in selfdefence, in the back, while she was trying to escape across the border between China and Nepal.

The official Xinhua News Agency said: "A small squad of Chinese frontier soldiers found the stowaways and tried to persuade them to go back to their home, but the stowaways refused and attacked the soldiers."

Bit hard in a country where firearms are banned - and no eyewitnesses saw any "stowaway" holding a weapon.

The Mexicans brought a wry Marx Brothers touch to execution. In 1920 a general ordered his men to shoot an elderly president of the Republic named Carranza, then inspected the bulletridden body and announced that it was the worse case of suicide he had ever come across.

***

Apparently diplomats at the United Nations raise their eyes to heaven whenever Pak Gil-yon, the North Korean ambassador, grabs the microphone. He's always irritable. He shouts a lot. Then flounces off. His nickname at the UN is "Dr Chuckles".

As to the possible implosion of North Korea, a senior US commander said: "If there is anybody in the UN who thinks it will just be a matter of feeding people, they're smoking dope."

***

Quotables: "You can push people to a certain level until they explode." Islamic radical Abu Izzadeen, on the BBC's "Today" programme.

***

"Its students have a reputation for sex and drug-taking, yet Manchester University attracts more applications than any other college." Sunday Times.

***

"The President of Estonia gave her a woollen wall hanging. In return Queen Elizabeth gave him a silver claret jug. He held it up as though he had just won the Open at St Andrews." Times writer Alan Hamilton on tour with the Queen in the Baltic States.

***

"Oh, s***! Look what I've done." Steve Wynn after putting his elbow through a US$139-million (Bt5.18-billion) Picasso.

***

Sunday Parable: In ancient Greece, Socrates (469-399 BC) was widely lauded for his wisdom. One day the great philosopher came upon an acquaintance who ran up to him excitedly and said: "Socrates, do you know what I just heard about one of your students?"

"Wait a moment," Socrates replied. "Before you tell me, I'd like you to pass a little test. It's called the Test of Three Cups."

"Three Cups?"

"That's right," Socrates continued. "Before you talk to me about my student, let's take a moment to pour out the dregs of what you're going to say into the three cups, and see what is left. The first cup is Truth. Have you made absolutely sure that what you are about to tell me is true?"

"No," the man said, "actually I just heard about it, and ... "

"All right," said Socrates. "So you don't really know if it's true or not. Now let's try the second cup, the cup of Goodness. Is what you are about to tell me about my student something good?"

"No, on the contrary ... "

"So," Socrates continued, "you want to tell me something bad about him, even though you're not certain it's true?"

The man shrugged, a little embarrassed.

Socrates continued. "You may still pass the test though, because there is a third cup, the cup of Usefulness. Is what you want to tell me about my student going to be useful to me?"

"No, not really ... "

"Well," concluded Socrates, "if what you want to tell me is neither known to be True, nor Good, nor even Useful, why tell it to me at all?" The man was defeated and ashamed.

This is the reason Socrates was a great philosopher and held in such high esteem.

It also explains why Socrates never found out that Plato was sleeping with his wife.

Compiled by Roger Beaumont